Nothing To Say

i am still here but life is attempting to swallow me....do yourselves a favor people....take care of your health...and nag the hell out of your spouses until they do the same....

knowledge of life's timestamp is shitty knowledge...

These are a few of my favorite things.......

(tap tap tap)

hello?? is this thing on???

YEAAAAAAHHHHHHH BITCHEEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!! I'M BACK! AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO YA!!!

Yeah yeah I know....I've been out for a hot minute - but truthfully, my life has been turned upside down and inside out since oh, I don't know...OCTOBER!!!

But it seems as though things are slowly begninning to turn around for the positive....and so in keeping on this positive note, I am going to share with you some of my absolute favorite Christmas ornaments. My munchkin is waaaaayyyy too young to have made me one yet (although I suppose we could bronze and hang one of her poopy diapers - however, that is...ummmmm....what's the term I'm lookin for??? oh yeah.....NASTY ASS!!!!

So with that being said, all of my ornaments are store bought...but they are sweet, sentimental, and super special to me....hope you enjoy....


for Grandmother...she fought to the very end...love you always


3 weeks ago today 8 asked me to marry him....since I'd already bought the ornament I thought it a good idea to say yes...hahaha...just kidding....I bought the ornament the NEXT day....

ahhh...yeah so we did things backwards....who cares...have you SEEN my munchkin..I'll do things backwards over and over again if I was guaranteed that kind of love every time...THIS is one of my favorite ornaments!

ummmm HE-LLO!!! HOW COULD I NOT????

this is a pic of one of my dearest, and most adored friends....because we are actually cute in this pic, I know we weren't drunk yet....but we WERE pre-partying....ahhhh...the good old days....now pre-partying = licking the beaters clean of cupcake mix for a kids birthday party....

So there ya have it lovelies...oh and did I mention I JUST put the tree up today....and I have done NO Christmas shopping whatsoever.....hahahahahaha

hahahahahahhahahahaaaaaaa

hahahaha

WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

hack hack hack....clean air beware

i'm almost done dying folks...should be back tomorrow - for reals.....in the meantime check out supah's face on "Love My Glog" (previous post).....it looks like a vision of mrs. potato head on a bad acid trip...lo(hack hack hack) l.....miss you guys....love you more....

but don't breathe my air..u don't want none o'this.....

OH AND BEFORE I FORGET.....

please go and show my very best real life friend michelle rooney some serious bloggy love....she is following her passsion for photography and is seriously talented with kiddies......love love LOVE ON HER....

if u don't i'll breathe on you, spit in your tea and lick every spoon u own.....just kidding....or am i?

http://michellerooneyphotography.blogspot.com

Love My Glog

Dear Friends of My Name is Mommy :

( I can fucking hear my husband peeing upstairs right now.. that is so damn gross. )

That’s just a perrrrrfect fucking way to start off my GUEST BLOGGER POST a.k.a. Glogger post for my friend whose name is Mommy. Just about as perfect as droppin the F bomb 2x in one post intro.

This is MY ONE CHANCE at fame… and I’ve already been done gone and fucked it the hell mess up.

Shit.. 3times.

So : for those of you who need an intro to the enigma that is SupahMommy… here I am. In all my glory. I am a mommy of 2 wait.. shit.. 3.. I actually just typed 2! SOMEONE slap me! I’m My Name Is Mommy’s ( MNIM) favorite ever ever ever blog land friend.

( I can type whatever the hell I want… cause she's not here!) MNIM has crawled off o' her death bed to send me a smoke signal…

GLOG

4

ME

SUPAH

headed

TOWARDS

the

LIGHT

must

post

SOMETHING

It was an awful lot of smoke. I told her she couldn’ve just fucking emailed.( 4x) . it would’ve been easier.. but hey. She’s a drama queen. So I put on my supah cape, stopped what I was doing ( feeding my baby) and rushed over here to serve you all with my stupidness.

You see folks: she is swimming in bronchitis or some drama llama shit like that. I think she gots the swine. I hope you all wore your facemasks and hazmats for your stop over here. I’m not sure if she lysoled this shit down. * insert not so sure face

I’m safe though.. you see..

I been done got the swine.

So I’ll do the typing for her. Since she’s hacking up lungs and stuff it’s the least I could do.

I figured I’d come on over and mess her place up… take some silly pictures with her camera and post them for you to laugh at until her return. So wish her well. Don’t breath any of her air germs and enjoy the pics AND the GLOG POST J

Xoxo

supah

Here are some pics courtesy of my mac Photobooth.

Just kidding. I only look like that when I gots the "swine." Poot MNIM.. she probably looks like that now too!

Here's my REAL glog. HAVE A GREAT SWINE FREE DAY FOLKS! Stop over and see me sometimes.. ROWWWWLLLL ! **** I was brutally and maliciously attacked last evening and I am reporting it HERE on this blog before I take my story public to all of the land. FUCKIN A. I stopped at the big bird, our local overpriced grocery store, that reels me in easily everytime, to grab some items after work last night. As any good citizen, should, I returned my damn shopping cart to it's rightful corral about 10 car slots up from my vehicle. Ran up there in the FA- REEEZING cold of night... gave it a BIG ASS SHOVE .. saw the effer head into the corral all by it's lonesome. Promptly headed back to my vehicle. Which happened to be my husband's BRAND NEW JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE. Got back in. Put the car in reverse. Looked ahead actually, oddly.. into the window of the vehicle parked in front of me. There was actually a driver in the car. I smiled politley cause I'm a friendly sorts and thought nothing of her oddly wide eyes. Turned my head, began a slow backup for takeoff... and off to my right out of the back side window.. when what to my wandering eyes do appear? Headed DIRECTly TOWARDS my vehicle, that is again not mine. On a slow and meticulous track toward my rear side panel. Like some stripped down version of Carrie- the killer car that gave me nightmares at age 12. That fucking shopping cart. Slow mo we go. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. screams supah from the confines of her vehicle.. frozen .. unable to move due to her inability to think through situations of emergency kinds.... Says the shopping cart from the depths of hell, reaching a maxium speed of 8 miles per hour... " YEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS." Bang. Nothing I could do. Old Wide eyes ( person in vehicle in front of me) connected with me for a moment before I winced and got out of my car. THANKS FOR THE WARNING jack ass! COULDN'T YOU HAVE signed TO ME THAT IS WAS COMING? I know sign language for pete's sake. At least the alphabet. Maybe written as sign in lipstick ON YOUR WINDOW??? Sent off a CARRIER pigeon to bring me A NOTE TELLING ME THAT THE CART WAS HEADED DIRECTLY FOR MY HUSBANDS NEW CAR????? UGHHH. So.. I get out. Run around to check the damage.. annnnnnnnnnnnnnnd.... as always... there's more. THAT FUCKING CARRIE CART... bounced off of my car and was headed.. WHERE YOU ASK???? DIRECTLY TOWARDS WIDE EYES VEHICLE. So I signed to her.. IN MY BEST SIGN LANGUAGE SKILLS. "Hey.. JACK ASS... you know that cart you didnt' tell me about.. the one that hit my husbands brand new car? Yeah that one.. WEll it's headed for your headlights. " And I got in my car and left. xoxox© supah

dont' forget about:

bLerApy blog - anon-y-mous bloggin

Writers' Roundup - creative writing group ( assignment due NOv 11th)

skyping with supah - speak to supah and be featured on her blog * NEW

and supah's last giveaway! Pet Festival!- night light, id tags, doggy vests and books

Tiptoeing All Around

I think perhaps I may be a horrible, horrible human being. 8's grandmother is tiptoeing the line between the clouds and the land. We have been told that she will be dead by Monday at the very latest. And 8 has asked me to come with him to her home tomorrow. Of course I will go. Not only because I adore his grandmother, but because I love him with every ounce of life that courses through my veins. And with every ounce of life that is leaving hers.

But I am selfish.

I am horrible.

I don't want to go.

I absolutely do NOT want to watch death steal life from this woman.

I absolutely do NOT want to watch death push and prod and pull on everyone's heartstrings....teasing us....taunting us....bringing us to the brink of relief and soulful pain time and time again, only to laugh in our face and say "no, not yet...i'm not ready for her yet"

I do not want to sit in the house and listen to death slowly rob her from us, breath by shallow breath

I do not want to sit and watch life die

It is selfish of me. I know this. Because I am not thinking of 8 in this equation of birth + first breath = life and life + last breath = death.

I have watched death tip toe, jump, run rampant, and sprint through the people I love. I do not feel like I can do this again. Every encounter scrounges up memories of the last encounter, and while rumor has it that it is supposed to get easier as you get older, it is just that - a rumor.

Death will never be easy for me. I will never accept death as the norm. I will never accept death as the norm. I will never accept death as the norm.

Cancer, I hate you.

Death, go away. and don't come back. not even on a rainy day. don't come back. don't come back.

Don't.
Come.
Back.

POST IT OR SUCK IT!

and last but surely not least......


SEE YOU WEDNESDAY!!!!

If I Can't Blog Tomorrow It's Because My Hands Caught On Fire

Yep. You read right. There is a very real possibility that my hands could spontaneously combust tomorrow.

For those of you that don't know, which is probably most of you because I recently went MIA for about two weeks - I GOT A J-O-B!!!! I am no longer filled with the guilt of a catholic hooker. I am a contributing part of my household, and yes, I am thrilled to be paying taxes once again. Weird, right? It's like that high you get when your period FINALLY shows up after being one minute late. You know that feeling - well, not you Ethanblippity-blop or Steve Anthony....at least I hope you guys don't. But anyhoo, yes...mama got a job. BUT.....it's in a bridal salon.

Now this is a VERY GOOD THING FOR ME.

But a VERY BAD THING for my honey.

Because see, he has yet to adorn my left handringfingerjustbelowthesecondknuckle with a shiny, sparkly bauble. Now yes, he has bought me a ring with diamonds.....and that's exactly what it is... A RING WITH DIAMONDS. A beautiful ring with diamonds that I absolutely LOVE, but if you're breathing and you're a girl and you've watched SATC a gazillion times, you know there is a difference between A RING WITH DIAMONDS and A DIAMOND RING.

Here is my ring with diamonds.....


It's beautiful. It's antique in style and fits me perfectly. I gasped when he gave it to me last Christmas. I love my ring with diamonds.

However, I'm a mom to HIS kid now. We live together. We talk about THAT day as if it's just around the corner. And now I work in a bridal salon. I promised myself I wouldn't touch any of the dresses because I knew that would be the end of me. All so called patience would run screaming from my body and I would end up a hot mess, crying every day saying "why won't he marry me" (and I swear if anyone makes that stupid cow and milk reference I will say very not nice things about you in blogland....even if I have to make them up...and I have a VERY good imagination). But then this conversation took place with my boss before I left today....

Me: Ok....So I'll see you tomorrow.

Him: Yep. Big day for you. You're trying on dresses tomorrow.

Me: I'm sorry. Did you say I'm trying on dresses tomorrow?

Him: Yes ma'am.....and veils and tiara's too.

Me: (lookin' like a deer trapped in approaching headlights) Ahhhh...ok...see you tomorrow!

Me in my head: ohshitohshitohshitohshit......what the eff....what the freakin' eff....I haven't TOUCHED a wedding dress in 4.5 years ON PURPOSE.....crapcrapcrapcrapCRAP!!!!!

I haven't told my honey this is happening tomorrow. He knows it will happen at some point in my training but he doesn't know tomorrow is the day. I haven't told him because if he responds with "Ha! Have fun with that" and I punch him in the mouth out of sheer reflex, I might go to jail. And I don't want him raising the munchkin without me. He might send her off to school one day with a giant, nappy mess for hair, and I can't have my girl lookin' like she's homeless. She's just too cute for that. And honestly, I'm too cute for jail. I ain't tryin' to be nobody's bitch. I got my own bitches.....heeeeeeeyyyyyyy bitcheeeeeeesssssssss...ya'll know who you are.....

So anyways, if I don't blog tomorrow, it's most likely because my hands caught on fire after touching a wedding ensemble. Which I suppose would save my honey the trouble of having to replace my ring with diamonds with a DIAMOND RING.

I keep mentioning that in the hopes that he might decide to actually read this post sometime in the near future and feel a sense of urgency to make a shiny, sparkly purchase for my lefthandringfingerjustbelowthesecondknuckle. Should he get hit with such inspiration, here is a little help.....

Something like this, or even this one in particular, would look a-freakin-mazing on my lefthandringfingerjustbelowthesecondknuckle. I'm just sayin'.....


But then again, if my hands catch on fire, he won't have to worry about that will he....

unless it comes in an ultra fabulous toe ring......


please ladies...like u wouldn't......don't front.....